A Much Larger Picture

How do we know when we’re living our soul purpose? …. I can tell you this …. it is when you understand exactly why every experience, every mistake, every painful moment of your existence as a human, makes complete sense. We know we are fulfilling our soul mission, when we can reflect on our past, forgive ourselves, others, take accountability, own our authenticity, and when we can finally see the bigger picture … this is when we are universally aligned and soulfully awake. Once this happens … there’s no going back.

I learned what my soul mission is … the hard way. The universe put me face to face with everything that terrified me; including death. All this in an attempt to strengthen me, to prepare me for my life’s purpose. The universe preparing me to become an incredible PSW, a healer, a writer, an educator, a compassionate human; now placed regularly at the bedsides of those who are taking their last breaths. If someone told me that I would be working on a CCC, Rehab and Palliative ward … in a hospital at 41 years old … I would’ve laughed at them.

I remember being scared of everything; crippled with hypochondria, breathless anxiety, and debilitating panic attacks. In no way could death ever be part of my soul mission. How very, very, very wrong I was. I read an article recently, about how we get to pick our mission and our soul family. In the article it talks about how we choose our parents, what we want to experience on earth, how we do it, who we want to complete our soul mission with, and about choosing our death. This made me reflect on a conversation I had years ago, with my best friend Nicole; who now I was sitting beside at the hospital, where she was laying unresponsive, hooked up to oxygen, and I was watching her Cheyenne stroke breathing. I struggled with the realization that these were my last hours with her.

I thought about the first time we met, how we became friends, the adventures we had, the spiritual discussions, and last night as I stroked her arm in that hospital bed … I remembered the dream she had … and how she thought she’d die. Nicole saw herself in a hospital bed, hooked up to oxygen, there were tubes, and she vividly described the loud and constant beeping. Nicole could see that she wasn’t old, but she wasn’t terribly young either. We talked about that dream a few times over our 16 year long friendship … her own 43 year old death premonition, and she needed to tell me.

Nicole was a super mom, a warrior, the epitome of love, kindness and someone who would give you her last dollar if it meant helping you. She battled Carcoma Cancer. A rare, genetic form of Cancer. Nicole’s body would form benign tumors over her lifetime, but the ones that took her leg … and that spread into her lungs; cracking her ribs … were not. Nicole’s battle included having her leg amputated, and learning to walk again … all while teaching herself how to care for her recently diagnosed son with Type 1 Diabetes. Keeping him alive was her soul mission. Nicole educated herself on Type 1 Diabetes, actively supported TD1, taught others how to care for him too, all while she was battling her own health war.

I held her arm, kissed her cheek, and told her how much I loved her … I understood why I was there. Nicole chose me to incarnate with her here on earth. I understood why she only told me about her death dream. I was to be present by her side, that was my role in her journey. I needed to put my hands on her, to be a bridge for her soul, and to comfort her as she transitioned. Connecting the dots to a much larger picture.

Nicole chose me to incarnate with her here on Earth … but I believe we chose each other. Her role in my soul mission was to prove to myself that I am gifted, that I am a healer, that I am meant to fill big shoes in this lifetime. Nicole’s role in my soul mission was also to help me remember to tell my survival story, to keep going, to live life proudly. Our warrior souls meant to spread hope, love, light and awareness. Nicole’s story will be intertwined with mine forever. If it’s true that we get to pick our death before we are born … then I know the other part of her soul mission is to keep me protected, healthy, and well … because one day … I will be 150 years old, in an old folks home, have dementia, be shaking my cane at everyone … and still telling our story … over … and over … and over again … I love you Nicole. ❤️❤️❤️

xoxo 💋 ScarlettAngel777